Stop the Insanity

Did you ever have to play dodge ball when you were a kid? The nuns used to make us play; I think it was some kind of lame substitute for real phys ed. Anyway, I always thought if I hid behind someone else, I’d really be the last kid picked and somehow the game would be over before I was up. It never worked that way. Thump.

There’s no hiding, even in this tiny little world of romance publishing. Of course if you’re a writer, you don’t really want to hide. But you do want to avoid the crap sometimes. Can you? Is there a middle ground between having a blog that’s all nasty and gossipy and trashes this person, that company, etc.–and the opposite–chatting about your pets or your latest reviews? I ask because there are a few things that have gotten under my skin in the last few months.

The thing that makes me nuts is the territorial nature of some loops, groups, etc. Why can’t I be pals with someone who writes for a company I don’t write for anymore? I found myself suddenly dumped from a loop. Can’t get a promotion up on a rather large group to save my life, when one author sneezes and it gets promoted. What’s up with this stuff? Did I bring it on myself (I know the answer to this–shush)? It’s so silly, honestly. I think the reason I like groups like Romance Divas so much is because so many different levels of experience, so many publishing companies, etc. are represented. What’s the point of being cut-throat over a few hundred readers?

I’m being too obtuse, I know. Part of the “I’d better keep my mouth shut and not name names” thing. I’m rambling, just wondering if anyone else has ever felt “alone” out there? Don’t. There are two of us.


4 thoughts on “Stop the Insanity

  1. Nonny says:

    Yeah. I’ve seen that kind of attitude before. When I and several other people broke away from a toxic writing community, anybody from the old site that wanted to be a member of both or still talk with us was “blacklisted.” No one was actually banned, to my understanding, but it was made very clear they weren’t welcome there.

    I’m not sure if that’s still the case now — as it’s been three years — but the administrator for that community still blames us for the problems they’re having on the site. It’s ridiculous.

    I don’t have much patience for that kind of bull. It’s why I love RD — they’re accepting of just about *anyone,* even the people who aren’t primarily romance writers. I won’t put up with that behavior on Evolution (the site I admin) either.

    I don’t know why people do it. I just — don’t understand that mentality. I’m really sorry you have to deal with this. *hugs offered*

  2. Michelle Pillow says:

    Good days and bad days, lol. It’s the same with any business. Not everyone is nice. Try to keep your chin up, we all get frustrated.

    (Not that I know your personal sistuation)

    I’ve had my problems with some loops and just left the loop to find a better place to hang out at.
    Michelle, Writer of the Peciousessnesses,,, how did you say that on the blog? lol

  3. Dyana Lunaris says:

    My hubby constantly has to remind about how this is all really just a popularity contest and not really about how well you write anyway. I wish you luck and feel free to post on my loop anytime, any promos or excerpts you want!

  4. Kendra Clark says:

    Ah…I’m sorry this sort of thing goes on. I guess that’s why I’m an observer on most loops. Sometimes I think I really need to dive in, others I’m glad I haven’t because of the drama.

    I don’t *do* the drama thing and I don’t understand why some people really like it.

    Head up! You’re great, Ciar.

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