Reflux Writer’s Ass

It’s a sad disease, this RWA. You sit on your butt in front of the computer while others dance and sign and network. The symptoms may include sadness, irritability, posting and blogging excessively, commenting on things you really don’t understand. Fortunately, there’s now help. Ask your doctor about Logoff. I’m so glad I did.

I cared for a little while, I really did. Got all huffy. RWA dissing my vanity publishers and all, how dare they? My writers’ organization, not doing the right stuff for the romance writing industry.

Then I took Logoff. Now I don’t care. I don’t care if some writers dressed up as their characters (can you imagine caring about that?)–I don’t think it’s too much like a fan event. What would be wrong with a fan event? What’s wrong with readers showing up to get Nora Robert’s signature or giggling at someone dressed up as one of their characters? If you want to attend a writer’s retreat, go to one. I think these folks are concerned that things are getting a little too RTimeish for their taste. They need Logoff.

I don’t mind that reviewers were there. Reviewers and bloggers are like the press, why would you want to keep them out? I’m so much calmer about both groups of bottom feeders–I mean my good friends. I’m kidding, kidding.

I don’t care that a YA book won a RITA. I’m not sure what the acronym stands for. I don’t think I’ve ever read a RITA-winning book.

I wouldn’t want my books stolen en masse and sold on ebay, but hey, I have folks write me outright for books to sell! I don’t have to go anywhere for that.

Since I’ve been taking Logoff, RWA seems like a distant memory. I’m glad those of you who went had fun, I really am. But I really wonder what we could all do if we pulled together our time and energy and focused instead on…I dunno, Darfur. Okay, I know your industry is important to you, but it’s not important to your readers. Most of them don’t follow your books to the internet. They pick them up at the grocery store and curl up on the couch, and have a damn good time.

I’m really giving serious thought to starting a charitable organization. Go ahead, laugh. Think electronically/small-press published writers couldn’t pull together for a good cause? What are your suggestions?

BTW–Side effects of Logoff may include fewer sales, less notoriety, a bad reputation, and death.


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