Thirteen Things I’d Never Reveal to Anyone

1. I am really frightened in a car, unless I’m driving. Really frightened. Like, take medicine frightened. Car accident, age 16.
2. I’ve had weird “what would happen if I let go of the steering wheel” moments when I’m tired. Not suicidal thoughts, but just “how far can you let a car drift?”
3. I’m not very kind to the children in the neighborhood. I have no children, and I never figured out how to bond with them. I hate when they leave their bikes on my lawn. I fear I’ve become the crazy old lady of the neighborhood.
4. I am terrified of dying.
5. I really don’t like dogs, I just try to be polite around them.
6. I make up stories about cats all the time. Their ball teams, their camping trips. Husband says I should be a children’s book writer. I much prefer to write sentient animals than human characters.
7. When I was little, I used to pray to the Virgin Mary to not appear to me. That’s because I thought I was saintly. I am not kidding.
8. I once told a woman that I thought the reason people didn’t like me was because I’m paranoid. It took several moments for her to explain to me the irony of that statement. I’ve since gotten help.
9. I prefer giving to receiving. You know…come on, you know what I mean. Sure you do.
10. Sometimes when I awaken I think I’m married to my ex-husband. It never feels as bad as it did when I was married to him.
11. I dream constantly of planets exploding, haunted houses, flying, and being on vacation but not getting to the airport to come home.
12. I’ve lost just about any writing friend I ever had, and I don’t know why. Perhaps it’s that paranoia ;o)
13. Since childhood, I have secretly felt, deep down in the recesses of my heart or soul or whatever, that I am blessed and am meant to do something special one day. I hope I don’t run out of time.

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